The Devil is a High School Student Part 2

Confused? Check for part 1 in Other Fiction. Enjoy.

Now, you might be wondering what the hell, no pun intended, the Devil, Master of Darkness, is doing in high school. You see, this is what they've left out of the bible. When God, my ex-best friend, decided to punish me, he didn't just send me to Hell. No. He did something much, much worse. He sent me to high school. Day after day of endless "OMGs" and "check out the tail on that hottie." What's worse is that I never graduate. Every four years, a new high school. A new identity.

High school is a playground for the seven deadly sins. There's wrath for one thing. I've seen one-hundred pound girls pommel each other until they bleed. Gluttony is everywhere; too much alcohol, drugs, studying, and there's binge eating. Anorexia's different. That's vanity, and it's rampant. Pride also exists in the way the jocks smack-talk each other and the nerds flaunt their grades. Envy abounds and whether we want somebody else's body, clothes, boyfriend, or money, no one is immune to it. Sloth can be seen where slackers put off homework and assigments. I won't even cover lust. It's too much for innocent ears, not that anybody's really innocent any more. I'm just here, above it all. I don't need the seven deadly sins to get to Hell. Unlike my slaves, I don't bow to temptation; I cause it.

Why don't I enjoy all of this sinning? It's what I do, isn't it? Make people sin? I don't enjoy it because I'm not doing it. It's not like the good old days when creating sinners was actually challenging. I remember when the cheerleaders wore entire sweaters and their skirts went below their knees. That was when boys asked girls to "go steady" and it was naughty just to make out at the drive-in. Back then, I had to fight to gain victims. It was so much more satisfying to corrupt an innocent soul after a little hard work. Now people are corrupting themselves for me.

You probably think I'm evil, don't you? Good. That's exactly how I like it. I don't want to kill my reputation. People fear me, but fear is just a form of respect; the best form. You can use it to get people to do what you want.

I may not like some of God's ideas, but I have to admit that high school is a brilliant punishment. Long. Boring. Generally useless. I could kill myself if I were actually able to somehow kill myself. It's impressive. I didn't know God could be so evil, so cunning...so much like me. I'd bow down to him if it didn't go against everything I stand for.